while i'm ever so bummed that borders bookstore is now going out of business (due to the consumer's fondness for technology, all things quick and impersonal, and the subsequent horrid popularity of this *curses* kindle nonsense)...whoosh...i AM thrilled that i was able to snag a discounted copy of one of my favorite films, staring one of my favorite men (and sicilian dream), buffalo '66. upon re-watching it tonight, i was reminded just how thoroughly it rips my heart out of my asshole, each and every time. yes vincent, yes.

ooof

an ira glass pillow? dreams really do come true. 

these days

the heat feels like this.

fever

sleepless deliriousness. is it night or morning; the increase in frequency of bird chirping drowned out now by a shabby sputtering fan. my sheets are wrinkled. i feel broken. and warm. new faces rouse spirit, blindly, all but the beginning of an end i feel. whittled thin. red collarbone. knee sweat. halved peaches and sticky fingers. katie's multiplying freckles. farm fresh brown eggs and meringue. i make friends at bus stops. an elderly peruvian woman asks if i go to high school and gasps and cackles at my revealed age, the italian blood!, she is certain. she waves me goodbye and i wish she were my abuela. a middle-aged misses with cheeks like plums and whitewhite hair. she shuffles in her scrubs, spouting the woes of inaccurate scheduling and her desperation for frozen yogurt. my kale has wilted. i want to go fishing with my father. even if there aren't any fish to catch. i'll borrow my sister's baseball cap because it's my favorite kind of green.